Catholics in Ireland welcomed a lesbian couple back to their parish after a right-wing parishioner pressured the couple to leave last year.
Jacinta O’Donnell and Geraldine Flanagan had resigned as choir leaders for St. Michael’s Church in Athy, County Kildare. Last week, they returned to the parish and resumed their roles with overwhelming support from the local community. The couple was interviewed by radio station KFM and said they received public support that “overwhelmed and humbled” them. O’Donnell told The Journal:
“We will never be able to sufficiently thank you, the people of our congregation, the people of our town Athy, for your love, your support and your prayers. Buoyed by all of this support, we as a choir will be returning to sing at 6pm Mass in Athy tomorrow evening. . .It is our wish that the focus should now turn to the love of God and his mercy.”
The couple married in July 2015, after which the editor of a right-wing Catholic newspaper publicly criticized them and contacted them through a “very personal text.” Facing pressure, they resigned from the music ministry, as well as from leadership positions with Lay Dominicans Ireland.
O’Donnell said their whole purpose in serving in the music ministry was to “enhance the Eucharist,” but, during the dust-up last year they felt that perpetuating the controversy fueled by this right wing editor “would be really futile and would negate anything we’re trying to do.” So, they made the “very difficult decision” to resign, despite being supported by the pastor, Fr. Frank McEvoy, and fellow parishioners.
The Mass welcoming O’Donnell and Flanagan back was quite the liturgical celebration, reported The Irish Times. Parishioner Sandy O’Rourke-Glynn posted a video on Facebook, which you can view below. O’Rourke-Glynn commentedd, “I have never enjoyed a mass as much – 5 priests, 8 altar servers, a full choir and a packed church.”
The Mass is a positive ending for an ugly incident. This is not the first time right wing members of the church have targeted LGBT people, and it is likely not the last. Recent examples include the forced resignations of Catholic News Service editor Tony Spence and Catholic Relief Services’ Rick Estridge, as well as denial of communion to Barbara Johnson, at her mother’s funeral. But the community in Athy has exhibited Irish hospitality, especially the Catholics at St. Michael’s Church who lived their faith by standing up for inclusion and justice against right-wing attacks. And by loving one another and remaining faithful to God, Jacinta O’Donnell and Geraldine Flanagan certainly enhanced the Eucharist last Saturday. Thankfully, they can now do so at many Masses to come.
The following is a statement of Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry’s Executive Director, released on June 12, 2016, in response to the mass shooting at a gay and lesbian nightclub in Orlando, Florida, earlier that day.
Words truly cannot express the horror, anguish, anger, and revulsion at the news of the mass murder of at least 50 people at a gay and lesbian nightclub in Orlando, Florida. Such an action should instill in all people around the globe a commitment to end gun violence and to protect the lives of LGBT people.
Adding to the anguish of this tragedy is the response of most Catholic leaders. The Vatican’s initial statement expressed sorrow and condemnation, and hope “that ways may be found, as soon as possible, to effectively identify and contrast the causes of such terrible and absurd violence . . .” But the Vatican did not refer to the fact that this violence was directed at the LGBT community.
Similarly, Archbishop Joseph Kurtz, president of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, made no direct reference to the LGBT community in his statement, noting only that the incident should call people to “ever greater resolve in protecting the life and dignity of every single person.”
While individual bishops have reacted publicly to the violence, the only statement thus far from a Catholic leader which mentions the gay and lesbian community is Chicago’s Archbishop Blase Cupich. In sympathy, Archbishop Cupich stated that “our prayers and hearts are with. . . our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters.” Such simple words should not be difficult for Catholic leaders to mention in the face of such vicious horror. Archbishop Cupich is to be praised for being a light in the darkness.
Clearly the targeting of a gay nightclub shows that, homophobia is a major factor which causes “terrible and absurd violence.” This attack highlights the fact that around the globe, every day, LGBT people face oppression, intimidation, and violence. Homophobic and transphobic attitudes and behaviors are carried out all-too-commonly in the form of discriminatory practices, verbal abuse, bullying, imprisonment, physical and sexual abuse, torture, and death. In many cases, this brutality is sanctioned by governments and religious leaders who propagate homophobic and transphobic messages. The Vatican and other church leaders have yet to speak clearly and definitively on these contemporary issues despite the fact that official church teaching would support condemnations of these hate-filled messages, practices, and laws.
As we pray for an end to gun violence and an end to violence directed against LGBT people, we also include in our prayers the hope that Muslim people will not become victims of a backlash against them because of the shooter’s religious background. Such a response is as vicious and senseless as the violence perpetrated against the nightclub victims.
The Orlando murders should move all Catholic leaders to reflect on how their silence about homophobic and transphobic attitudes and violence contributes to behaviors which treat LGBT people as less than human and deserving of punishment. This sad moment in our history should become a time when Catholic leaders speak loudly and clearly, with one voice, that attacks on LGBT people must stop.
The good work done by the LEAD Ministry of St. Matthew’s Church in Baltimore has been profiled before on this blog, but a new video series gives even greater insight into the ways this ministry serves the people of God. Filmmaker Eric Kruszewski produced “The Lost Flock,” the seven-part series on LEAD, which stands for LGBT Education and Affirming Diversity. He told Out Magazine:
“I was raised Catholic, but have not practiced my faith in years. And before this project, I had never heard of Saint Matthew Catholic Church. . . It was clear that there was something special within this congregation.”
Though not an LGBT Catholic himself, Kruszewski hoped the documentary could “accurately capture their thoughts, feelings and experiences” and advance the discussion about acceptance of sexual and gender diversity in the church.
The series covers diverse perspectives when it comes to LGBT identities in the church. One part documents the baptism of a same-gender couple’s daughter, with one of the dads saying that St. Matthew’s is a place which honors their relationship and which supported them during the adoption process.
In another, a lesbian woman named Gigi describes first being disowned by her adoptive parents but then coming to see God through her partner, Ashley, and through the church community which quickly welcomed her.
In a third part, Henry, who comes from Kenya where homosexuality is criminalized, explains why he participates with the LEAD Ministry. He says the LGBT communities need support like anyone else, and further:
” ‘I always ask myself: What would I do if one of my daughters or one of my sons came out? Do LGBT people need to be accepted? To be heard? Yes. We have got to find a way to give them everything they need.’ . . .Gay or straight. We are together.”
But “The Lost Flock” is not simply positive stories. It also explores the harsher realities of LGBT Catholics’ experiences. In a segment about Rachel and Vania Christian dos Passo, the film highlights that their marriage cannot be recognized in the church and for this reason, Vania explains:
“We made a serious decision to leave the church. We want to have a family where our children don’t feel pointed out because we are gay. . .W still go to LEAD because its family for us. But unfortunately we have to live this exile until one day, maybe in another lifetime, gay people will be equally recognized in the church.”
Then there is Carolyn’s story, the Catholic mother of two gay children, Renee and David. Though there were no difficulties with Renee’s coming out, her husband was unable to accept David’s sexual orientation and kicked their son out of their home. Carolyn now says she wants the same opportunities for my gay and straight children in the Catholic Church.” She says further that it was this idea that “was the foundation for LEAD” and expresses her own growth since joining LEAD as a Catholic led by her conscience.
Those profiled have helped foster the safe and affirming space that is LEAD. Supporting the ministry is Fr. Joe Muth, the pastor, who, in his own video segment explains why, as a Catholic priest, he supports this LGBT work, saying:
“I don’t think the institutional church realizes how hurtful they are to homosexual people when they come across so harshly on that issue. The institutional church says, in a sense, you can be a part only so far.”
Muth acknowledges that LEAD struggles with being an LGBT support and outreach group, while at the same time worrying about being closed down by higher church officials. Despite that threat, these Catholics have managed to build up a more and more affirming community. They host parish events and have even participated in Baltimore’s Pride celebrations the last few years. As Bondings 2.0 has written previously, LEAD is a model for the Catholic Church when it comes to LGBT pastoral care.
To learn more and view all seven videos that compose “The Lost Flock,” click here. To read Bondings 2.0‘s previous coverage of the LEAD Ministry, click here.
To learn more about some of the hundreds of parishes across the U.S. which offer a welcome to LGBT people, click here.
The ALL ARE WELCOME series is an occasional feature on this blog that highlights Catholic parishes and faith communities that support and affirm LGBT people.
News headlines tend to focus on what bishops say and how they act regarding LGBT issues in the church, but focusing only on the hierarchy can distort the reality of the Catholic faith as it is lived locally. A recent piece in the Detroit Free Press helps correct this distortion, sharing the story of a same-sex couple and their experience of being warmly welcomed in the church.
Bryan Victor and Thomas Molina-Duarte are faithful Catholics and, since moving to Detroit in 2012, they’ve been parishioners of St. Charles Borromeo Church. Described as an “integrated and active” place, this parish welcomes all “the real-lived experience of people,” said Victor including him and his husband.
Both expressed that being Catholic is central to their lives, though relating to the church has not been without challenges. Victor and Molina-Duarte each said they stepped back from the church for a time, but they began attending Mass together after meeting each other in 2010.
Now, Victor explained, they “remain in the church rather than leaving” and are open about their sexual identities and marriage. Molina-Duarte, who said the challenges are now an “afterthought,” expressed why the couple remains but refuses to be closeted:
” ‘You’re called to be in community and seek justice and how can you do that in a closet?’ “
Victor, a social worker, said further that faith both guides him and provides community:
” ‘I carry that Gospel message out to the secular world, and my work is reflective of the church. . .I am sustained and nourished by the church. I’m sharing my gifts and talents within the church.’ “
On the question of Communion, about which Detroit has experienced controversy because of Archbishop Allen Vigneron’s previous suggestion that marriage equality supporters should refrain, Victor added:
” ‘We examine our consciences and we know that our love for each other does not take us out of a relationship with God. . .It takes us into a closer relationship with God. And for that reason,we feel comfortable presenting ourselves for Communion.’ “
It is worth noting that this informed conscience decision is precisely what Chicago’s Archbishop Blase Cupich called for the church to respect in a recent interview.
Victor and Molina-Duarte married earlier this fall, saying they were “driven to our marriage by our faith” and not simply marriage equality’s legalization. Though their ceremony was held at a nearby Protestant church, the couple is welcomed together by their Catholic parish. The Free Press reported a recent example of this welcome. Capuchin Fr. Ray Stadmeyer, the pastor, calls forward those who had birthdays and anniversaries for a blessing at the end of Mass each week. When Molina-Duarte came to the front on his birthday, Stadmeyer said the following:
” ‘Bless our brother Thomas. Bless him in his relationship. . .We thank him and Bryan for all the goodness they bring to us. May they know God’s tender graces.’ “
Molina-Duarte and Victor are warmly accepted by another priest, Fr. Ronald Victor, who is the latter partner’s uncle. Of the couple, Fr. Victor said:
“They are two very holy guys. . .I do see their union as being sacred and sacramental, in the sense that it reflects God’s love.
“While [their relationship is] not necessarily life-giving in a biological way. . .it’s life-giving in other ways.”
Victor said his perspective changed when his nephew, with whom he was quite close, came out. The priest is now public about his willingness to bless same-sex unions and added that, at the couples’ wedding, he was “a little angry and a little disappointed that we couldn’t do it in a church where I could have officiated.” Fr. Victor suggested many priests believe as he does but remain quiet out of fear.
Their wider families have been quite supportive, too. Only one person refused to attend their wedding. Victor’s dad, Lennie, summing up the families’ response:
” ‘If the church makes you choose between your family and your faith. . .I guess we voted for family.’ “
In a related note, Bishop Thomas Gumbleton, who is a former auxiliary in Detroit, recently offered a day of reflection with Fortunate Families. He, too, was changed by a family member’s coming out when his brother announced he was gay. Gumbleton told those gathered:
” ‘It’s clear the movement is there. . .but it takes a long time for the teaching to permeate the whole church, and people will fight it.’ “
Pope Francis is creating space for LGBT Catholics, their families, allies, and pastoral ministers to move the church closer to a church that is “home for all.” When church leaders make exclusionary and even homophobic or transphobic remarks, it can be helpful to remember local stories like this Detroit gay couple and their parish. Truly, it is in these spaces within the Church where that movement Bishop Gumbleton identified is happening, and it is in this movement that we must place our hope.
The ALL ARE WELCOME series is an occasional feature on this blog that highlights Catholic parishes and faith communities that support and affirm LGBT people.
Conversations about LGBT inclusion in the church often focus on bishops’ words and actions, particularly those of Pope Francis. But most church reform happens elsewhere, fostered by local communities. Today’s post lifts up one parish where faithful Catholics are building a church that is “home for all.”
The National Catholic Reporter (NCR) recently featured St. Matthew Church in Baltimore as part of their series “The Field Hospital,” focusing on the parish’s LGBT ministry.
The LEAD Ministry, an acronym for LGBT Educating & Affirming Diversity, has grown tremendously since its origins in 2009. Its mission statement explains:
“St. Matthew LGBT Ministry (LEAD) commits to modeling a community of faith and spirit that works toward openness and understanding; LEAD strives to offer justice, healing, and wholeness of life for all God’s people. We believe that the unique diversity of the Community of St. Matthew will continue to grow and demonstrate a unity of faith that transcends our differences and celebrates the gifts we are from God, our Creator.”
Led by Fr. Joe Muth, pastor for 25 years, St. Matthew’s “prides itself on inclusion”with parishioners from more than 45 nations. While the LEAD Ministry contributes to that overall vibrancy, it also provides a safe space for LGBT Catholics who’ve felt excluded by church. NCR noted that many share how they were unwelcome at parishes and rejected by family:
“Those finding a safe nest with LEAD continue to come forth with their stories: a woman who was disowned by her family after coming out as a lesbian. Another unable to talk for decades about sexual orientation with her lesbian sister. Another participant talked about her niece, who came out to her when she was 12, and who committed suicide when she turned 58. Such stories, say participants, can make support groups like LEAD a matter of literal life-or-death.”
Vania and Rachel Christian dos Passos, a married couple, are LEAD members living in the church’s tension around same-gender relationships. Vania said LGBT Catholics want to participate fully in the church, not just accept “crumbs from the table.” For now, the married couple attend a United Church of Christ congregation while being involved at St. Matthew. Rachel explained:
“LEAD is a safe space for us to be our authentic selves. . . [until] LGBT couples can be equal to straight couples in the eyes of the Catholic church.”
There is an evangelical component to the LEAD Ministry, too. Members not only support Catholics and welcome non-practicing Catholics home, they welcome other Christians and spiritual seekers. Gweyn Brown, who has a lesbian daughter, said LEAD meetings “could be a light for people outside the Catholic faith.”
The Ministry hosts monthly meetings and wider parish events, which have included a conversation on how families are impacted when a member comes out, and also a screening of “Saint of 9/11” about Fr. Mychal Judge. NCR‘s report continued:
“Committed to what participants call a safe place to gather, LEAD has been public in its witness. Its participation in this year’s Baltimore Gay Pride Parade elicited comments from onlookers surprised to see formal Catholic participation in an archdiocese led by Archbishop William Lori. . .”
Although there have been some discussions with the Archdiocese of Baltimore, a cordial relationship exists between the ministry and the local hierarchy. Bishop Denis Madden, an auxiliary, has met three times with members and leaders even met once with Archbishop William Lori once. Madden told NCR he was “impressed by…good people” who enact locally Pope Francis’ more welcoming style.
The LEAD Ministry emerged following a presentation about Maryland’s marriage equality law. Carolyn Scheide, who has two gay children, asked how the parish could respond. From there, parishioners worked with Fr. Muth, parish leaders, and New Ways Ministry’s Next Steps program to develop the LGBT ministry that bears tremendous fruit today. You can more about the ministry’s history here.
You can also view journalist Eric Kruszewski’s video series on the LEAD Ministry, titled “The Lost Flock,” by clicking here. His videos feature interviews with several members and Fr. Muth.
There is a clear lesson evident in the LEAD Ministry’s good work, which I have witnessed firsthand, and that lesson is this: the Catholic Church is renewed and reformed most fully when the faithful own their faith and act upon it.
Put another way, Pope Francis’ call for mercy and inclusion will be meaningless without groups like the LEAD Ministry. The pope’s greatest contributions will likely be his episcopal appointments and the space which he is creating to go to the margins of our own church for ministry.
Reading about St. Matthew is an occasion to ask ourselves anew: What am I doing to build up a Catholic Church that is inclusive and just and a home for all?
Do you want to do something to help further LGBT equality in society and the Catholic church but are not sure what you should do or could do? If so, then you are a candidate for New Ways Ministry’s Next Steps program.
Next Steps is a weekend program designed to help people plot out a course of practical, feasible actions to further LGBT equality and justice that they can perform in their home communities. For more information, contact New Ways Ministry at info@newwaysministry.org, call (301) 277-5674, or click here.
The National Catholic Reporter’s Tom Fox greatly helped the burgeoning movement of gay-friendly Catholic parishes in the U.S. by publishing a five-part series examining the life of one such parish, Most Holy Redeemer (MHR), San Francisco, which he notes is often referred to as “the gayest Catholic parish in the nation.”
The interior of Most Holy Redeemer parish church.
Fox’s series on this parish should be read by anyone interested in Catholic LGBT ministry. Links to the individual articles are interspersed throughout this post, as well as listed individually at the end.
What emerges from this in-depth examination, however, is not how extra-ordinary MHR is as a Catholic community, but, instead, more about how much it is similar to every other well-run parish. It is a center of faith which responds to both the spiritual and practical needs of the people in its neighborhood.
MHR’s welcoming atmosphere is partly a result of the fact that it is located in the Castro neighborhood of SF, probably the largest LGBT communities in the country. But what is interesting is that not all parishioners are locals. Fox pointed out that many people travel from all over the Bay Area to attend Mass and programs there.
Young people, a demographic that seems to be disappearing in most Catholic parishes, are one group in particular that have found MHR to be a spiritual home. Fox explains:
“Younger Catholics come from around the Bay, making up much of the parish. The very diversity that once moved some Catholics to flee MHR now seems to draw others, especially younger ones who feel at home and want to help prepare their children to live in an increasingly diverse world.”
That’s a lesson that many Catholic parishes should learn: if you want to attract younger people, welcome the LGBT community.
Fox raises an issue which many LGBT-friendly Catholic parishes face: how to be welcoming when so many LGBT people are suspicious of official Catholicism. Jim Stockholm, a longtime MHR parishioner, explained the challenge:
“It’s the Catholic faith. It’s got a bad rap in the LGBT community. We have an archbishop who helped fund and led the charge against same-sex marriage. All that translates down to, in some way, our parish. We’re in the Castro, in the community, and so we have the challenge to overcome that, to say we are welcoming.”
While certainly unique because its parishioners are predominantly members of the LGBT community, the parish operates very similarly to other parishes of its size. In the third part of the series, Fox examined an important question for MHR and for many LGBT-friendly parishes: Are they the “gay parish” or are they a Catholic parish that welcomes gays? Parishioners seemed to be definite that MHR was the latter, and not the former. One member, Bob Barcewski said:
“We don’t see ourselves as a gay community, but rather as a community that’s open to gays.There’s nothing in this church — no functions — that are gay here. There’s nothing gay about what we do here. It’s an acceptance and a realization that people feel OK to be who they are that makes this place different. It’s also a history of knowing that this was one of the few places anywhere, where people who were catching a mysterious disease and dying like flies, stepped up and responded.”
Most Holy Redeemer parishioners march in San Francisco’s gay pride parade.
Indeed, when the AIDS epidemic hit the Bay Area in the mid-1980s, it was at the same time that the parish had begun to open their doors to the LGBT community. Ministering to people with HIV and AIDS became a focus of the parish’s ministry. The fourth part of the series examines this critical time in the parish’s life, and it notes that MHR’s outreach is recognized by many others in San Francisco as being pioneering.
Their solidarity with those who suffer now extends to the homeless community, with weekly suppers, which, as one parishioner pointed out, are more accurately described as “banquets.”
In the fifth and final installment, Fox summarized his experience of researching this series. His comments serve as a reminder of the importance of LGBT ministry in the Catholic Church:
“In dozens of interviews over several weeks with MHR parishioners, I found both pain and an eagerness to celebrate. I found a desire to be better understood by the wider church community. I found a willingness to forgive. I found much openness and universal abhorrence of judgment.
“I found hope, sometimes fledgling, that [Pope] Francis, given enough time, can change the course of the church, especially in how the institution affects the lives of LGBT Catholics. I found an extraordinary eagerness to come together as people of faith to help each other in ways big and small. I found, in words often suggested by Most Holy Redeemer parishioners, community in the Castro.”
Accompanying this five-part series are two side-bar articles which allow the voices of LGBT Catholics to be amplified: 1) a profile of Robert Pickering, a gay Catholic man from Denver who, like many other out-of-town LGBT Catholics, visited MHR when he was in San Francisco one Sunday; 2) snippets of conversations from the dozens of interviews that Fox conducted with MHR parishioners.
The series certainly does justice to the immense amount of faith-filled outreach that this community of and for LGBT people has accomplished. The work done here is a perfect example of the hundreds of Catholic parishes across the nation who have welcoming LGBT ministries. You can find a list of many of them by clicking here.
To read all previous posts on LGBT-friendly Catholic parishes and pastoral work, go the the category “All Are Welcome” or click here.
–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry
Links to Tom Fox’s National Catholic Reporter series on Most Holy Redeemer parish, San Francisco:
The ALL ARE WELCOME series is an occasional feature on this blog that highlights Catholic parishes and faith communities that support and affirm LGBT people.
Two parish events in recent months reveal the ways in which Catholics are expanding LGBT welcome and propelling conversations about family in the Catholic Church.
The first example comes from the Life Questions group at St. Edward Church in Racine, Wisconsin, which held two events last November, according to The Journal Times, dealing first with marriage and second with pastoral care of LGBT people.
In the first session, attorney Mark Hinkston explained the differences between civil and sacramental marriage. Given marriage equality’s inevitability in civil law and the Catholic bishops’ opposition, he asked participants:
” ‘Can there be a middle ground?…It will be interesting to see how the practical situation plays out and to what extent the church will take notice.’ “
In the second session, Fr. Allen Bratkowski, the pastor, and Deacon Keith Hansen, who has experience in LGBT ministry, focused on welcoming lesbian and gay people within the church. Hansen reiterated the discomfort that LGBT people feel, even while possessing a “deep faith” and said parishes need to “be more welcoming than we are.” He continued:
” ‘We struggle in our church to accept all of our neighbors, as Jesus taught us to love…God loves all of his creations unconditionally and we are called to do the same.
” ‘We need to let [gay people] know “We need you to be our ushers and to serve on our parish councils”…We need to say “You are part of God’s church, please join us.” ‘ “
Fr. Bratkowski responded to parishioners’ practical questions about how to include LGBT people and reminded participants that “the church does evolve and change.” He also said he would baptize children whose parents are in a same-gender relationship.
The second example comes from a group of Catholic parishes in Waterloo, Iowa, that are hosting seven “Listening Sessions” in the coming year for “inactive Catholics and Catholic seekers.” They describe the sessions in the following way:
“These listening sessions are an opportunity to discuss your past, present or future relationship to the Catholic faith community in a safe, discrete, and welcoming environment. We’re here to listen, not to judge. If there is some way we can be helpful to you in your present spiritual circumstance, we will arrange whatever additional help or assistance you desire as a follow up to the listening session.”
While not focused specifically on LGBT issues, the sessions welcome those hurt by church leaders, upset about the hierarchy’s teachings, or made to feel unwelcome because of their marital status. This positive parish outreach is in the style of Pope Francis, who champions mercy and welcome as keys to evangelization.
The events in Racine and Waterloo are only two examples of the tremendous work being done to share stories and raise marginalized LGBT voices. Indeed, the faithful people behind them are sources of hope for the Catholic Church in 2015.
To read more about the work of local Catholic communities striving for a more just and inclusive church, check out Bondings 2.0‘s series “All Are Welcome” to the right or by clicking here.
In this blog’s All Are Welcome series, we try to assist parishes and faith communities that want to do outreach to LGBT people and their families. Often in that series, we highlight some steps parishes can take to make that welcome known, and sometimes we highlight the gifts that LGBT people bring to a parish.
This blog post fits into a whole different category. It is the story of how LGBT people have been part of helping a parish in New York City to thrive in life and attendance, thus helping to save it from being closed or merged in the recent archdiocesan cutbacks there.
St. Francis de Sales Church
NYPress.com recently profiled St. Francis de Sales parish on East 96th Street in Manhattan, focusing on the incredible growth the parish has witnessed in recent years. The reporter observed:
The Catholic archdiocese of New York has recently made some tough decisions about consolidating churches throughout the five boroughs, due to lack of resources, declining Mass attendance and difficulty maintaining older facilities. But despite the desolate picture presented to some parishes, St. Francis de Sales Catholic Church on E. 96th St. is thriving and growing, bringing in younger parishioners and catering to the changing populations of Yorkville and East Harlem.
Pastor Philip Kelly speaks about his congregation with a touch of awe for their enthusiasm and willingness to get involved in the parish community, and he credits them with helping to grow the parish from a few hundred weekly Mass attendees to about 600 today.
The pastor and pastoral associate Jayne Porcelli began a program of reaching out to young single people in their neighborhood. The pastor noted, ““I’d say the average age is 28-30 years old. On Sundays you have to dodge the baby strollers [in the church aisles] – and the scooters.”
But it was the LGBT community in particular played an important role in the parish’s re-birth:
“One of the programs at St. Francis that Porcelli and Fr. Kelly credit with helping to keep the congregation young and vibrant is their LGBTQS Catholic Alliance – a gay-straight alliance group that bills itself as “an inclusive and welcoming fellowship.”
“ ‘I had a very positive experience with my faith and coming out when I was younger,’ said Jay Malsky, who is 29 and the coordinator for the group. ‘When I moved to 102nd and Lexington, [I came to St. Francis], and the message is so clear and welcoming.’
“He said that he wants to help other gay and lesbian Catholics experience the same positive feelings of support and community that he acknowledges they may not have gotten elsewhere. Asked if it truly is an alliance – do straight people join, too? – Malsky laughed. ‘Last night, we were outnumbered,’ he said. Many parishioners join because they have gay family members, or just want to be part of a social group that also shares Scripture readings during their wine and cheese nights.”
St. Francis de Sales statue in parish.
On this blog, we never get tired of noting that the younger generation of Catholics is much more acclimated to LGBT people than any previous generation before them. For these younger people, the issues of gender identity and sexual orientation pose no problem–even for religious inclusion. The St. Francis de Sales shows that if a parish wants to attract the younger generation of Catholics, many of whom were alienated from church by previous negative pastoral experiences, the pastoral staff must include LGBT support and spirituality on the parish’s agenda. As theologian Father Bryan Massingale said at a Pax Christi conference in 2013:
“For the young people I teach, equality for gays and lesbians is their civil rights issue. . . . For young people, the litmus test of the credibility of a religious institution is their stances on LGBT rights.”
The St. Francis de Sales story has another lesson, too. It shows that LGBT people want to be part of their church and will respond positively to an invitation and signs of authentic concern for them. And the entire parish can benefit from their gifts and presence.
In many parishes across the nation, participation in parish life by LGBT people has not only been a spiritual boon, but has also helped to re-animate the entire community and often encouraging welcome to other diverse groups. Pastoral leaders should consider not only the Gospel call to welcome all, but also take note of the benefits that such welcome could have for the entire faith community.
Does your Roman Catholic parish welcome LGBT people? How has your community benefited by their presence, in practical and spiritual ways. Contribute your answers to the “Comments” section of this post.
To learn more about gay-friendly parishes, click here to read all the posts in our All Are Welcome series or click the “All Are Welcome” button in the “Categories” box on the right-hand side of this page. You can also visit New Ways Ministry’s list of gay-friendly parishes and faith communities by clicking here.
The ALL ARE WELCOME series is an occasional feature on this blog which highlights Catholic parishes and faith communities that support and affirm LGBT people.
Though we report and comment a lot on this blog about bishops and the Vatican and politics and theology, for the vast majority of Catholics the deepest experience of “church” is not at the hierarchical level, but about what happens in their local communities and their day to day lives. That’s why parish life is so important–and so important that it be a community life where LGBT people and their parents feel welcome and affirmed. Although there are no statistics about it, I think more people decide whether to stay in or to leave the Church based on what their local pastor or fellow parishioners say to them than anything that is said by the pope or the bishops.
News reports recently from different parts of the country gave a close-up view of the work that several parishes are doing to make sure that LGBT people and family members know they have a place at the table.
The programs at each parish vary, but all share the common threads of prayer, support, sharing stories, and discussing topics that are relevant to LGBT people, such as raising a family as a same-gender couple. The effectiveness of these programs is evidenced by the testimony of participants and observers. For example, the newspaper article reported:
“John still feels welcome in the church. That’s due in part to his parish priest, but also to a cadre of faithful who gather regularly to pray and explore what it means to be part of the body of Christ, regardless of one’s sexual orientation. . . .
” ‘The Gay and Straight in Christ ministry has been a huge help for me,’ said John, who asked to be identified only by his first name in deference to his wife, who has struggled with the revelation that he is gay. ‘They make you feel that you can still be part of the church and that there are people who are supportive, even if the hierarchy and individual people aren’t.’ “
A local theological expert also praised this type of pastoral program:
“These kinds of ministries are consistent with church teachings on human dignity and conscience, and efforts by Pope Francis to balance church doctrine with mercy and compassion for the ‘messiness of people’s lives,’ said the Rev. Bryan Massingale, who teaches moral theology at Marquette University.
” ‘They are witnessing to the totality of our Catholic teaching, not just teachings on sexual acts … but on the dignity of the person who is loved by Christ regardless of their behavior.’ “
The tension between church teaching on sexual abstinence vs. the individual’s conscience is certainly present in such ministries, but , as Deacon Sandy Sites of Good Shepherd stated:
“What we are saying is that you are welcome here. Your story is between you and your confessor and God. I don’t care who you are. When it comes to the teachings of Christ, it’s not about the sin, it’s about the person.”
In Baltimore, Maryland, St. Matthew parish has been leading the way in that archdiocese by proclaiming a welcome to LGBT people through their LEAD ministry (LGBT Educating and Affirming Diversity), which recently hosted a panel of LGBT people and parents telling their stories so that the wider parish community could learn more about them. The Catholic Review, the archdiocesan newspaper, reported on the event:
“About 50 people attended the two-hour event, which included a question-and-answer session. Attendees asked for advice on personal situations, including navigating conversations with family members.
“ ‘People find themselves in a confusing place because they have a faith that allows them to be strong in the face of adversity, but they sometimes have a church that’s been challenging them about how they should see their family members who are gay,’ said Father [Joseph] Muth [pastor] in an interview after the event.”
Fr. Muth also emphasized the healing and reconciling role that panel presentations of personal testimonies can have:
“I think through that storytelling, people begin to see how hurt people have been and how they’ve turned away from the church. With the church’s whole emphasis on this new evangelization, this is a real opportunity to reverse the attitude – to have a more welcoming, compassionate, listening attitude, to tell people they can be included.”
The panel took place while the Synod on Marriage and Family was taking place in Rome, but Fr. Muth noted that pastoral outreach is not dependent on whether or not the Church changes its teaching on gay and lesbian relationships. He stated:
“The church teaching may or may not change at some point down the road – that’s not something I can do anything about – but the initial step to people who have felt rejected and put aside for many years is to create an atmosphere of welcome.”
These ministry examples from Wisconsin and Maryland are great models for the increasing number of parishes across the country who are opening their doors to LGBT people. You can find such parishes by checking out New Ways Ministry’s list of gay-friendly parishes and faith communities by clicking here. You can read more about the LGBT-friendly parish movement by reading the blog posts in Bondings 2.0’s “All Are Welcome” series by clicking here.
If you want information on how your parish can start an LGBT ministry program or develop an existing one, contact New Ways Ministry by email, info@NewWaysMinistry.org, or by phone, 301-277-5674. We’ve helped scores of parishes expand their outreach in ways that suit their particular situations.
OECTA teachers march in WorldPride 2014 held in Toronto
The ALL ARE WELCOME series is an occasional feature on this blog which highlights Catholic parishes and faith communities that support and affirm LGBT people.
LGBT and ally Catholics appeared at Pride festivities around the world this month, visible signs of Pope Francis’ desire for a more merciful and welcoming Church. Canadians welcomed Catholics from around the world for WorldPride 2014 celebrations, while Catholics in the U.S. participated in local celebrations.
Toronto was the site for WorldPride this year. All Inclusive Ministries (AIM), based at Our Lady of Lourdes Church in that city, brought “its message of faith and love to this celebration” by welcoming Catholics from around the world to their monthly Mass and gathering. AIM began with support of the Archdiocese of Toronto in 2012 after the Jesuit parish ended its affiliation with Dignity Toronto Dignité, which now meets elsewhere. Another church, St. Joseph’s Church in Ottawa, sent a delegation to join AIM’s liturgy and march in the WorldPride parade, having witnessed in their local parade for many years.
Members of St. Clement Church in Chicago march during Pride
The Ontario English Catholic Teachers Association (OECTA) also marched in WorldPride’s parade following several months of criticism from Toronto’s cardinal and others who opposed the teachers union’s decision to march. OECTA President James Ryan told the National Post the teachers’ participation was an “internal union matter” made through a democratic process. The paper reports further:
“In March, the OECTA voted to send a contingent of more than 100 to the parade as a visible and vocal message that Catholic-school teachers in the province want students to feel supported and free from discrimination.
“OECTA is just aligning with other public unions and teachers’ unions Canada-wide, said Mr. Ryan, whether Catholic or not.
” ‘Coast to coast in Canada, pretty much every teachers’ union I know of does support LGBT rights without exception,’ [Ryan] said. ‘The Canadian Teachers Federation has been very forward with its support for LGBT rights.’ “
You can read Bondings 2.0‘s ongoing coverage of OECTA’s decision this spring by clicking here.
Boston College’s Graduate Pride Alliance marching
Catholic parishes in the U.S. marched in Pride parades in their citis, as well. In Chicago, St. Clement Church parishioners marched alongside Dignity/Chicago members for the second year in a row. The Chicago Tribune reported on the marchers:
” ‘We don’t want to be dictated to anymore,’ said Rob Svendsen, 41, a parishioner at St. Clement for nine years. ‘With the new pope, we’ve all been given a new ray of hope.’…
” ‘What St. Clement demonstrates is there are Catholics in the pews out there who think this is a time to be united and give witness to what the church’s true mission is,’ [former Dignity president Chris] Pett said. ‘We are here to advance justice. We should be a church united in justice, love and respect for one another. What’s exciting about it is they come from a very affirming community.’ “
In Boston, contingents from both Boston College and St. Anthony Shrine were present during the city’s June 14th Pride festival. For their part, the Franciscan friars from St. Anthony’s in Boston hoisted a banner with the pope’s famous “Who am I to judge?” quote in rainbow lettering.
Franciscans from St. Anthony’s staff their Pride booth in Boston.
In San Francisco, St. Agnes, Most Holy Redeemer, and other Bay Area parishes joined together to ‘show their Catholic pride‘ at the city’s parade.
Parishioners from St. Francis Xavier in Manhattan in the city’s Pride parade.
In New York City, parishioners from St. Francis Xavier Church marched, as did a collaborative contingent from various metro NYC area gay-friendly parieshes, marching behind the banner of “LGBT Catholics and Friends.”
In London, England, members of the Archdiocese of Westminster’s pastoral outreach to LGBT people (called “Soho Masses” because of the neighborhood in which they originated) took part in that city’s pride march, complete with a giant street puppet of Jesus draped in a rainbow flag. More photos can be found here.
London’s LGBT Catholics march in Pride. (Photo by Martin Pendergast)
Repeatedly, Pride participants cited Pope Francis as a reason for their witness this month and also tied their actions to the Church’s standing commitment to social justice that has resulted in American Catholics’ overwhelming support for LGBT equality. Earlier this month, Bondings 2.0 suggested that marching for Pride was a key way to show solidarity for church workers under increased scrutiny for their support and involvement with marriage equality or because of their gender identity.
Additionally, many of the parishes mentioned above are on New Ways Ministry’s listing of gay-friendly Catholic parishes and communities. To find a parish near you, or to suggest a new parish for the list, please click here.
Did your parish or Catholic school participate in a Pride celebration? Let us know in the ‘Comments’ section below, so we can continue spreading the good news of an inclusive Church in the era of Pope Francis.
The 
New Ways Ministry's Bondings 2.0 Blog 